Wednesday, 21 March 2012

Is it Possible? Could it ever happen?

Hi everyone!

I am super excited this morning the reason being that, I have been believing God for something and I got it today! A miracle I would call it!!! I am so grateful to God.

Well, there was an interesting topic that was discussed yesterday during my Media Law and Ethics class. I think it is a controversial subject so I thought of bringing it on here so we continue the discussion right from here...

Law is as dynamic as society. There used to be a time when rape was established by the actual act of penetration and the examination of the alleged victim to see if there are bruises... (I talk am as I understand o!). Now, rape is defined as a situation where a man has carnal knowledge of a woman without her consent.

This discussion on rape, stirred up a controversy when as all encompassing  as it sounded, it almost exposed the status of the welfare of marriages; as the men and the women in my class became divided on a particular question judging "on the surface" from this new definition.

The question was "Can a man rape his wife?" Really... Can a man rape his own wife? Sounds weird, right? Almost all the ladies (including myself) said yes, whilst the men argued that its not possible because they paid the bride price of the woman and so for that matter own her body.

Which of the view points or schools of thought do you agree with?

This is a serious matter o! How should it be? Were the women taking it too far, or do you think the men were being selfish and insensitive? I am open to learn your thoughts on this issue, and I promise I will share it with my colleagues and lecturer next week. Thanks a lot. *Wink*

Peace... I'm out.

   
 

43 comments:

  1. *grabs front row seat*

    Bydway, good luck on uncovering Che #wink

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    1. you sure have the front row seat my dear...

      as for Che! hmmm....still got my gadgets ready for her unveiling soon! smh

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  2. First, thank GOD for the miracle HE had performed in your life.

    Laughing @ Toin.

    To the question at hand....NO! A husband cannot rape his wife.

    They have stood before GOD and man and vowed to be ONE, thus has the 'consent' to each other anytime.
    When a wife does not want it,the man would try to persuade or cajole or seduce her, unless, she does not love him or her body is made of wood! #laughing#

    p.s the word 'rape' itself had been abused and 'raped' several times.

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    1. lol @ "unless her body is made of wood" well... I get your point loud and clear though but what if after the cajoling and seducing the woman is still not in the mood but have to play along even without her consent because of wifely duties. e no be rape be that? (without her consent o!)lol.

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  3. Edem Fui Avevor:

    I married my wife to shag and how can it be possible that i will rape my wife?

    but can a woman also rape her husband?

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    1. nawa for you oo Edem, if the act is without her consent then it rape.

      about your other question, I wonder oo!! lol

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  4. Hmm, the ever famous old argument. Yes, I believe a man can sexually abuse his wife.

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    1. Yebo!! I believe strongly so too my dear.

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    2. I am also of the opinion that a man can rape his wife. Its simple, if she doesn't give her consent, and he sleeps with her, its rape.

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  5. Thank God for your miracle. it is possible. I know someone it happened to, but she said its her husband, so its not big deal. its kind of a tricky subject, but if you ask me i think the guy is insensitive.

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    1. Yea... very insensitive on the guy's part.

      I am glad to know that you are hail and hearty.
      *hugs*

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  6. of course i dont see why not.if a the act includes force,unwillingness on on the woman's part to concent to the sex act then it is by comparison rape.the important words to look out for are force and lack of consent.by the way,i share the view of a majority of other women lol

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    1. yes oo Marianne, force and lack of consent is the word. lol

      how you dey now?

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  7. Yes, a man can rape his wife and vice versa.

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    1. and vice versa?! hmmmm.... ok oh. thanks Myne

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  8. WHEN I CAN HAVE MISTRESSES?

    SHE CAN KEEP HER CONSENT!

    CAN'T MEN BE RAPED ALSO BY WOMEN?

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    1. lol@ WHEN I CAN HAVE MISTRESSES? SHE CAN KEEP HER CONSENT!

      as for the other way round, I wonder o!

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  9. Since this concerns husband and wife,my answer is NO.A man can never rape his wife.The bible stated it clearly in 1st Corinthians that a woman should never refuse her husband her body because it no longer hers and vice versa.In that light,it's unreasonable to say a man raped his wife.

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    1. Did you read the part where he said " but i say this as a concession, not as a commandment"? Or where He said "Husbands, love your wives and do not be bitter towards them" in Colossians?
      We're not the stiff necked christians of the old testament, we've been saved by grace and ought to be graceful to one another. If your wife no wan do, find out why... She may just be tired or your marriage may be in trouble. Whatever the case, if you force yourself on her you have raped her!

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  10. READ THIS ABOUT A WOMAN WHO RAPED A MAN!

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2118300/Rebecca-Helen-Elder-accused-raping-man-breaking-house-stand-trial.html

    WOMEN SHOULD STOP THIS DOUBLE STANDARD!

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    1. Just read the link and I am smh.

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  11. yes, a man can rape his wife. if she doesnt consent, its rape.
    thank God for your miracle, gently waiting for the full gist

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    1. Lucy! no wahala, I go yarn you gist soonest wai? hope you are good sha!

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  12. Let's not kid ourselves. A man can rape his wife. If it's not mutually consentual, then someone has been raped. Either the man or the woman.

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    1. I agree... lol@"then someone has been raped"

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  13. Yes, the bible asked women to submit themselves to their husbands... keyword "submit" so just because you're married to someone doesn't mean you can force them to have sex with you, we're not animals! Tina Turner left Iyke not just because he used to beat her but also because he used to rape her after beating her. Any man who enjoys having sex with a woman (wife or whatever) who isn't willing needs psychological evaluation.

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    1. I wonder how any man will beat his woman and later "jamb" on her in the name of love making. Lol@ they need "psychological evaluation"

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  14. I spend a night or weekend with my girlfriend, anytime my wife refuse to submit to me. I tell her i am traveling for official duty or i need to work overnight. I don't beg or take by force what is rightfully mine,so as not to be accused of rape. it sounds ridiculous! And any man that forces himself on his wife, is not worth his salt! When there are many girls outside ready to satisfy my fantasy. Like the previous anonymous said, she can keep her consent!

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  15. You paid her pride price doesn't mean she is your slave. And every woman has the right to say NO to her husband if the need be.
    Thanks for the visit and i look forward being part of your blog. Have a great weekend!!

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    1. thanks for visiting back.

      abi! paying her bride price doesn't make her your slave jare.

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  16. Hell nooo.... she is your wife not your sexual slave.... If she's not in the mood, it could be she's emotionally down or something. So you gotta find out what's bothering her before enticing her to have a shag with you...

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    1. lol@ have a shag with you, but its true sha!

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  17. for real?!!!!....you paid her bride price...so!!!!...wake up dude!!!..this is the 21st century and not some MEn dominating age where women don't have a say or are being treated as sex slaves...
    yes,i think a man can rape his wife because Sex in marriage is meant to be something beautiful and something of unity and not just for fun or skills. it was ordained by God to allow intimacy and not corruption and so the WOman must be willing if things are to be done appropriately and for it to be enjoyed.
    if she says she's not ready or not in the mood, thats what two becomes one means...you try to understand what's wrong, speak to her or cuddle her while you talk to her. before you know it, she might start loosening up and appreciate you more for taking time to see what was actually wrong with her and not just demanding without considering her feelings
    God created Women in a special way, kinda emotional and giving..., always wanting to give and so the best thing to do is to understand how she operates...once you can...then shikena!!!.LOL
    @priscy...am ff u already and i like ur blog...added u to my bloglists

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    1. i soo agree with you my dear. communication is key in such instances.

      thanks dear, I am following you back.

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  18. once again...glad u got ur miracle!!>>.***wink!!!

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  19. all these men saying I paid her bride price, does bride price make her your sex machine...oshisco.

    rape can happen both ways.

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    1. Lare! I wonder if paying bride price makes one a sex machine ooo!

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  20. I would have loved to be a fly on the wall in your class. What was the lecturer's opinion? I hope he corrected these brideprice paying men. smh

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    1. @"I would have loved to be a fly on the wall in your class"

      My lecturer is a man now so he asked us if we think he can really rape his wife! no be small thing oo. me, i no fit shout!
      yea he did correct the brideprice paying men! smh with you jare..

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  21. In my opinion, having non-consensual sex with ANYONE is rape. A man who truly loves his wife would find out why she doesn't want to sleep with him at any moment. Then, together, they work out whatever the lack of desire is about.
    Yes, a married couple should not 'starve' each other except on agreement and only for a while (lest the devil takes a foothold) but that agreement cannot come when there's no understanding in the first place. So, rather than force himself on her 'cos he paid bride price and therefore owns her body', he should work that magic that any 'correct' man knows would work on his wife. He just might score.
    And if he still doesn't, whatever happened to giving her his back, while fuming and plotting a similar revenge when her body decides not to be firewood? Hia!

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    1. lol@ "when her body decides not to be firewood?"

      I agree with you on the magic aspect, I believe everyman knows what works for his wife. I think that can be a tool that will him him score.

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