Wednesday, 30 May 2012

I got another question!

Hello my people!

*covers face in shame* I cant believe I haven't blogged in a month!! I am as surprised as you all are..wink! where do I even begin.... I got tagged in the elevens by Simply mee, Toinlicious, Amaka, BSNC, Sugar Spring, Efua Dentaa and a9jagreat, oh boy! I remember Toin told me I had about seventy something questions to answer! Can you believe that?!! well.... in due time, I will be giving what I have termed "my azonto seventy something answers" lol

I have got a question! Yes!!! I am back again with my questions!!! lol. An avid reader of my blog (as he called himself. lol) sent me a mail on something he said he wants to do and because he has read comments from great guys like you all and is pleased with most of the feedback's given, he will like to know your opinion on this issue. "Is polygamy a sin?" The following are the points he added, "What if the the man involved is head over heels in love with both ladies and they both accept to love him (and each other) and be loved by him (and each other)? Also, if it is not a sin and the scriptures do not forbid it, except (to the best of my knowledge) when a man desires to be a Bishop..., why do people frown at it and condemn the people in it? Further more, is it possible for marriages like that to succeed? And also, does the bible forbid it?"

I think this is quite a sensitive issue if you ask me because, sincerely, right from my childhood days till now, there has always been a "beef" about polygamy in the church and our work places yet, no one has really come out to say this or that is the reason why it is frowned upon. So my thought therefore is that,  even though it is "claimed" and argued, that there is so much competition in such homes which end up with fights, hatred and the rest, there are so many one man-one wife marriages which have much worse problems, which even end up in divorce.

I would like to recommend that we should say things higher than the obvious "why or what will make a woman want to share her man with another woman, and shouldn't she be afraid that this might make the man go in for yet another woman much later? Also, I would like us to avoid the competitive school of thought of "why would another woman want to share another person's "husband" when she can have her own?" Do all polygamous marriages fail? If you had a friend in it, what would your candid advice be? Is it wrong, is it a taboo, a risk or a sin? Can such a relationship work? Can a successful marriage and a successful family unit be achieved in that kind of environment? How will society see them? Is it not better than having a promiscuous, extra-marital affair?

Also I would also like for us to resist the urge of asking a question like what will even make a man desire to marry another wife besides his wife?  Could it be vanity or could there be an honourable reason? Can one find true love in such a place? (polygamous marriage/home). Okay, let me ask you my reader, in case you are faced with a situation where you find yourself in love with such a man whose wife has also accepted it as alright (or permissible) for the husband to marry another woman in addition to her would you agree to marry him, and why?

I have had this mail lying in my inbox for a while now, and didn't know where or how to go about it. I hope you all can help him make a very informed decision.

Thanks for reading and the comments in advance...

Before I forget, I have made some changes on the blog, do you like it? please let me know your thoughts on the changes as well ( I guess you guys will have a lot to answer) lol. I promise though that, I am answering all the questions that have been asked me in the elevens game, and will soon drop them in my next post.

Peace... I'm out!


13 comments:

  1. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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  2. I don't think polygamy is a sin but like all things, people should do what they can defend before God. Are there are many marriages that have broken down, many that have their own problems, and they are just between one man and woman?

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  3. Do whatever makes you sleep at night with a clear conscience. I however have seen kids from a polygamous home who seemed truly happy. For the four years that we were in school for, you could not tell who & who were from the same mother because they were that close. I don't know if it's always been like that though

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  4. Sincerely, polygamy is against the will of God! GBAM! How can a man become "one flesh" with two or three other women? This is not even a sensitive topic for a child of God. Its plain simple! Polygamy is a no GO!

    - LDP

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  5. Uhm....I dont know about this one from a religious perspective o.
    But straight to your question, why would have be comfortable with a man whose wife is ok with him marrying another woman? I can never believe that she is genuinely ok with it.

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  6. All i can say is it's not possible to get married to more than one wife and not sin against God.Women can never live together without quarrels.They take very seriously territorial leadership.Again,like someone mention,the bible in new testament didn't encourage it as it didn't tell of anyone who indulged in it.

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  7. personally, i dont think one man can love two women exactly the same...................... and that right there will be the beginning of the end. its very hard for two women to live peacefully together when they are sharing the same man

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  8. I will not even begin to answer this question. I know some people will try to sound politically correct here,

    but ahn ahhnnn...

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  9. ..well, i must comment on your new outlook..it looks okay#smiles# with that old house kinda feeling but it stil depends on what you want though...and i can see your priscy's shop right above...hehehe...will check it out..Wink!

    #coughs#...now down to business...about the question you asked, i cant remember where God even said it in the bible that a man can marry as many wives as he wants after "The Law of Moses"...dont get me wrong oo, i know we no longer live under the Law, but Jesus came to fulfill that Law and He explained things better and showed us how worse we were such that even looking upon a man or woman to lust after Her, you've already done the thing...as far as God is concerned
    David married more than one wife and if we're very observant you'll notice when God was scolding Him after the sin with bathsheba that you had more wives...and yet, even if you had wanted more, i would have given, but N.B..we all remember clearly what God willed for us since the beginning of Time..A man will leave His father and His Mother and cleave to his wife and become ONE...please how is that possible if a woman loves more than one man in A "sexual" way or If A man Loves more than one woman "sexually''?
    ...in my dialect, when a man acts like that, we call it "OJUKOKORO"...meaning Greed!!..covetousness, thats the problem. and its very clear in the bible that thou shall not covet. a marriage is even meant to please God in the first place and so How does that even please God when all the man has in his heart is to have more than one wife...thats where it all starts my dear, IN THE HEART..when he feels the one God had ordained Him to be with is not enough, then he needs to do some serious spiritual check up and ask God to heal His heart. and dont be deceived..when a man cannot be satisfied with ONE woman, He can never ever be satisfied with THREE or FOUR!!...andd so all that rant of loving them equally is a big Fat Lie.
    JEsus said if a man looks upon a woman to lust after Her, he has already commited adultery in His heart..when the scribes and pharisees asked about Moses telling them to divorce their wife, Jesus replied them bluntly that it was due to the hardness of their heart that He gave them that Law meaning that wasnt even the original intention of God for man and so why pevert it
    i believe most of the answers we seek for, we already know it and so we dont need to do round about in this topic.(e'g someone telling me that telling lies is not in the 10 commandments whereas the bible says whosoever loves and makes a Lie will have his part in the lake of Fire)
    Jesus said Let your yes be Yes and your No be No...when it starts becoming...emmm, and buttt....then its Evil and so beware
    we are not all perfect, neither am i , but i believe we can attain perfection if we're ready to open our heart to God and let Him speak to us,without letting the flesh contaminate it
    i hope you get my drift..sorry if i went too far on your wall but i just had to say the Obvious!!!
    Polygamy is not and can never be the will of God...#shikena!!!"

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  10. Excuse me for deleting my comment from this post priscy...i kind of feel some comments are indirectly directed to me and i am in no mood to join issues...religion is too sensitive.... so it's TO YOUR TENT O' ISRAEL! :D

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  11. Who are we to judge? In the days of old,polygamy produced lots of children for cheap labor.The man has to give me reasons behind his desire for another woman,but please don't tell me you would love us equally,you probably desire her gigantic boobs or...lol
    P.S i think the home would be better off with two men and a woman than with two wives and a husband...

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