Am here again. The story continues... if you missed the first two parts, please check here and here read, and as usual, let me know what you think. Thanks!
...I had made up my mind. I will go back down memory lane, and pick from my past that which will help me stand in my present. I have gone through three very devastating stages in my short life: I had come face to face with the treachery and deep deception of people; then I was defiled in installments by a man I thought I could one day grow up to call my father; then I have encountered the inner strength of a woman... I have experienced first hand how dangerous a woman can be, how weak men can be and what a woman of easy virtue (whether by choice or by default) can do to a man whose life revolves around the lap of a woman. My father thought me never to allow myself live beneath my worth... Never to use my point of strength as an advantage against the weak... Yes I have a father, better than any man I can remember. He left home and I still wonder why, but I am certain he is far more a man than Uncle Sam.
I had made up my mind. I was in bondage, yet I must be free. I must free myself. And for the first time since this experience began, thinking about my home gave me strength. I remembered the things my siblings and I were taught. I will be free even in this dungeon... The more I thought about it, the more a different kind of power surged into me, and the more I rose higher than the four walls where my tormentor had put me.
I remembered what my father used to say, that the power of a threat lies in the fact that it is faceless and nameless, dispensing from an unknown location; and when these three are known, threat becomes weak and powerless. Every time my father said this, he would sing the lines of a hymn that was like our family anthem... "Whatever my Lord, Thou hast taught me to say, it is well; It is well with my soul". Then as a family, we would all sing the chorus "It is well... It is well. With my soul... With my soul. It is well, it is well... With my soul"
For the first time in a time longer than I can remember, I felt a smile on my face, then I felt that surge again, and this time, it gave strength to my voice... and I heard myself singing that song. Tears ran down my eyes again, but this time they were tears of joy. I had just declared my freedom. Yes!!! No matter how the future days unfold, I had made up my mind to be free. And one day... Yes one day, I will be out of here and be far away from men like Uncle Sam. Yes I will. But for now, no matter what he decided to do with my body, I will be free. I will not kill him and I will not be less than what my parents brought me up to be. It is well with my soul.
Just as I was still smiling and basking in the joy of my new found freedom, I heard that sound which always announced the presence of my defilement in installments. The door... The door opened, but unlike before, I didn't shiver, I didn't shake, I didn't cry, and I didn't beg... I just kept singing. And while I sang, I started undressing. When I finished undressing, I went and lay down... Then I said "uncle Sam, I'm here. I'm ready. I'm waiting for you. Come... do your worst" Then I continued singing, only this time, I sang a little louder. The more I sang, the more powerful I felt and the more liberated I saw myself becoming.
Uncle Sam was scared! I didn't have to look at him to know. The fear that exuded from him, was so thick you could cut it with a knife. He was too scared to come close to me. He just shouted at me to shut my mouth up and stop the singing. The more he shouted, the more I sang in calm confidence and the more afraid he became. The next thing I knew, he dashed out of the room like he had seen hell, forgetting to even lock the door of my prison. The prison gates are now open, yet I lay down there as if I didn't care. I was already free! and I wasn't going to let any form of anxiety keep me down. Not anymore! Now this is power!!! Everything I heard about God is true. It had to be God.
After a while (I'm not sure how long) I got up from the bed. I got dressed, then I looked around that room like one taking a last look at a place to which she will never return, then I did something I couldn't have done in the last 2 years... I headed for the open door. From the passage, I could see the light of dawn, and so I just followed it, all the way to the living room where I first sat as a stranger to Uncle Sam's house. Again I looked around... And I was feeling stronger. Uncle Sam was no where to be found. I headed for the door, and just like a dream, the door was open; and the fresh morning breeze hit me.
I inhaled and breath the fresh air of freedom. I now believe in miracles... I now believe in God and the power of prayer.
To be continued...
An amazing twist wouldn't you say? Don't miss the final part of this story. I'm sure you would like to know how this whole saga will end.
Peace... I'm out!